


Scentist

by Porcelain_Rabbit



Category: VIXX
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-27
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-04-28 16:36:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14453364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Porcelain_Rabbit/pseuds/Porcelain_Rabbit
Summary: Secrets. Lies. Both do horrible things to friendships, relationships in general. When trouble arrives at the doorstep of the Shangri-La bar in downtown Seoul, Hakyeon is eager to snip the feeling of unease right at the bud. But when his best friend Taekwoon is insistent on being so secretive even when things start to get dangerous, friendships are pushed to their extreme limits and threaten to snap.What happened to those peaceful, easier days when one's worst nightmare was cramming a week's worth of homework into a Sunday evening? Hakyeon would give anything to have those days back instead of the crushing emptiness he feels now. He'd give anything to make Taekwoon stop hating him. Anything at all.A desperate man can soon find himself becoming a dangerous one all too quickly...





	1. Silence

**Author's Note:**

> Back at it again, this time for VIXX's latest comeback. Maybe I'll finish this one. The comeback was stunning on so many levels and is so inspiring, there haven't been enough fan stories/theories going around and put to paper at least. So I'm here to change that. I hope you enjoy and can maybe take something away from this piece.
> 
> -Porcelain.

**_“Why don’t you talk about us?”_ **

In a bar that looked far too high-end for downtown Seoul, there had sat a pianist whose fair hands caressed the ebony and ivory keys lined up for his picking. The piano, like most of the room, was plain white and precariously placed atop it were medium sized containers filled with some red kind of liquid, passing through tubes into one another for some unknown reason. From there, these transparent cables cascaded down from the sides of the piano, coiling like albino snakes around the man’s polished shoes and ankles before disappearing off amongst the sea of white. Like his surroundings, the pianist was almost as pale as the ivory, his hair a messy nest of greyish white that only seemed to deepen the gaunt look his eyes possessed, cut high above those cheekbones of his. If you didn’t look close enough or with intent and purpose, it was almost possible to miss the man in his surroundings. But for more than just the colour though. The man seemed as if he could be one with the instrument he played, as if it were an extension of his own being, the piano singing all the sweet notes he simply could not.

But as beautiful as the music was, there was only a handful of men around to even hear it. The bar was far from full, empty in fact aside from the mostly silent men who seemed to float about here and there. None of them seemed to want to come too close to the pianist, and there was only one daring to venture further than the rest, one whose skin was as beautifully dark as a winter’s evening, dripping with saturation when he coiled an arm around the musician’s shoulders.  
“Play something sweeter. I’m tired of melancholy. We should be celebrating.” The man’s name was Hakyeon, and even as he spoke the pianist hadn’t stopped, even if it was clear he disliked being so close to the elder let alone touched at all.  
“Don’t ignore me. Here, move over and let me show you how to do it.” Hakyeon insisted, trying to elbow his way into a better position on the small bench.

An awful groan ripped from the piano when Taekwoon jammed his hands down over the keys, tormenting them as his jaw clenched and he made his point known loud and clear. Flinging his hands up in the air, Hakyeon retreated and the piano’s unease ceased, the room awfully quiet and pregnant with the sudden weight and tone of the room.  
“Why do you insist on tormenting him?” The man from behind the bar counter had spoken up this time, lifting a glass to the light before he lowered it and wiped away at the unseen smudge there.  
“It’s the same thing every evening. Aren’t you tired of playing Tom and Jerry?” When he smiled there were impossibly deep set dimples and two rows of perfectly set teeth, unnerving if you looked a little bit too long at them. As Hakyeon took a seat on one of the stools, he slouched his shoulders forward and seemed to recede into being a pouty child, glancing over his shoulder at Taekwoon when his melancholy tunes had started up once more.

“I told you he hates me.” Hakyeon began with a whine to his tone.  
“It's almost as if he resents me for saving him.”  
“Maybe he does.” Hongbin shrugged, offering a flash of those pearly whites that didn’t match his tone or choice of words at all. It had Hakyeon staring at him in disbelief.  
“What person is bitter over being rescued? I _saved_ him.” Setting the glass down amongst its other polished twins, Hongbin tossed his cloth over one shoulder, placing his palms down on the counter in front of him whilst he leaned in, speaking in a hushed tone whilst his eyes were on Taekwoon’s back, boring holes into it.  
“What about the man you bring back from the brink of death, only to then suffer more in a miserable life than he already has? Would you have him be grateful then? For stealing his reprieve?” Hakyeon wanted to complain that that wasn’t fair of him to say, but the sudden sound of the piano stopping had him looking over, holding his breath out of fear Taekwoon had heard their conversation. But the pianist held no interest in Hakyeon or Hongbin, instead staring at the only entrance to the bar, head cocked to one side just slightly as if he were listening to something the others could not.

But it passed and soon Taekwoon, with a somber sigh, turned back to his piano and toyed the keys back to life, drawing keening notes from them that seemed to resonate around the room. It had, and always would have, a profound effect on Hakyeon. Watching him there all alone, so curious it ate away at him, so beautiful, so _deadly_.

“ _Hakyeon_.” Hongbin called for the third time, snapping his fingers in front of the man’s face which finally seemed to have him kicking into gear and realising he was being addressed.  
“Yes?” The elder asked, causing Hongbin to roll his eyes at the little lost boy expression on his face.  
“Opening in five.” The bartender lifted his wrist and without looking, tapped a finger to the face of his watch strapped around his wrist. With a heaved sigh, Hakyeon was pulling himself off of his perch and helping get the place ready for their unusually late night opening.

He turned over the chairs, tucking them beneath the tables before flicking on more of the lights but keeping them on a low level, the fdim yellow light highlighting the white walls in a honey glow that seemed to always have patrons sticking around. You see, the Shangri-La always opened at midnight, on the dot, and stayed open until dawn. It was all down to Taekwoon’s requests, and whilst they were situated downtown, they had people visiting from all over Seoul and South Korea, eager to see the strange bar with its even stranger concepts it had become known for. Tonight’s concept was purity, what with the white walls, piano and their splashes of white clothing. But it had always been like that, for as long as Hakyeon could remember there had always been these odd little concepts he had come to mostly have fun partaking in.

It might not have seemed like it, but the pair had known one another the longest time, before Taekwoon had even opened his precious Shangri-La. Hakyeon still remembered a sweeter, kinder child that his friend had been, even if he had been impossibly shyer then too. But things changed when they were seventeen, things said, things done that neither man would be able to live without now and it made Hakyeon wonder if perhaps his friend resented them for the past they shared together.

For being that one person Taekwoon felt he could never escape.

Hakyeon was soon drawn from his endless circles of useless thoughts when the scent of passiflora filled his nostrils, the same as it always did when patrons would enter their little abode. Sure enough, just as he had finished placing the last chair beneath the table their first customers came shuffling in, voices kept to a simmering level as no one really ever wanted to speak up loudly when Taekwoon was playing music for them. Though tonight he seemed to be playing for himself.

A mop of auburn hair followed shortly after, a youthful and bright face lighting up whilst he shot a hand up in a brief hello to Hakyeon. The elder returned the gesture before waving their doorman back out, Sanghyuk disappearing as quickly as he had appeared and leaving Hakyeon to see to their patrons. Hongbin at the bar, Taekwoon with the piano, Hakyeon on the floor and Sanghyuk their doorman. They had a nice little system set up and whilst Sanghyuk might have been the youngest and latest to join the group, he’d been doing the job just as well, if not better than his barely memorable predecessor.

As Hakyeon served another Death in the Afternoon and folded his tray under his arm, he turned his attention to Taekwoon who hadn’t shifted from the position he’d left him in, quietly watching the man and wondering if he even noticed the countless bodies that passed in and out of the room behind him.  
“Hakyeon.” Hongbin called and broke the man from his reverie once more, the elder looking over before he saw the tall glass of water on the bar waiting for him, Hongbin dropping something red into the glass before he nudged it forward. Hakyeon stared down at the drink for a moment, watching how the red drops formed tendrils, greedily swallowing up the once untainted liquid. He’d scrunched up his nose in distaste, hating that Taekwoon felt some kind of phantom reliance on these drinks, these droplets within them, but he knew better than to start that fight again.

He placed it atop the piano, just in reach for Taekwoon to take whenever he was ready. Hakyeon never knew or saw when the pianist took the drink, never saw him down the contents, never heard the keys slow or even stop long enough for him to do so, but whenever he would turn back a little while later it would always, always be gone. The man realised he’d been lingering around Taekwoon again, practically feeling the icy waves rolling off of his friend before he stepped back without a word, leaving the man to his ivory keyed lover. Was it ridiculous to feel jealous over a piano? Probably. Did that mean Hakyeon could or would stop how he felt?

Absolutely not.

  
  
  
  


          Another night over. Silence prevailing around the room and this was the only time when Hakyeon wished he could hear the other man playing his music. He always hated the silence. Maybe it was why he ran his mouth sometimes, the desperate need to fill any void or gap with something was better than letting it linger and crawl all over his skin in the most uncomfortable of ways. Perhaps that was why Taekwoon was so agitated around him, the endless need to say something, _anything_. Said pianist was lingering by the bar, his eyelids looking a little droopier, the pouches of fat beneath his eyes seeming to swell a little as if he was in dire need of sleep but knew he wasn’t going to be getting any proper rest soon.

Hakyeon watched him quietly from where he swept the floor, stopping for a moment to prop his cheek against his hands around the top of the broom. A small part of him was envious of Hongbin and how Taekwoon seemed to be so comfortable around him, chatting here and there and on a good day he’d be able to hear the younger’s laughter too, fleeting and brief but enough to set Hakyeon’s own mood soaring for hours. The larger part of Hakyeon that watched on was just mystified by Taekwoon and his own one-sided affection, not romance, not a romantic kind of love at least. But Hakyeon did love his friend, so much so he’d do anything to make him happy, and until he learned how to do that again like the old days then he would remain by his side in their Shangri-La.

“Everything’s all tidied and ready for lock up outside, Boss.” Sanghyuk chirped as he had joined them inside, propping himself up on a stool before Hongbin raised a brow at him, rolling his eyes before conceding and pouring the youngest a single tumbler of whiskey.  
“Good job. Here.” Taekwoon was a man of little words, but the bulging envelope he slide towards his doorman had the younger receiving his message loud and clear. A job well done for the past month of mishaps Sanghyuk would sometimes have to deal with when customers became too rowdy or insistent. Though more often than not, it would be Taekwoon insisting his doorman remove certain patrons from his bar. Mostly for no obvious reason, just that the man didn’t like them and wanted them gone, which for Sanghyuk, when you were paid that much, didn’t seem like something you ought to be questioning. With the whiskey gone a lot quicker than it should have been drunk (Hongbin making his complaint well known as the resident alcohol expert), Sanghyuk excused himself and said he’d see them all tomorrow night too, leaving the three men and soon only two when Hongbin had headed to the back to finish tidying up (after he too had received his monthly payment of course).

Hakyeon quickly returned to his sweeping, wondering if he finished up in time would Taekwoon mind him walking to their apartment together. Before he’d even finished the younger had answered that question himself, surprise washing over Hakyeon’s features as his friend had stood in front of him for a brief moment and jerked his head in the direction of the exit. Scrambling to put the broom away, Hakyeon was all too happy to walk with his friend, his own money he knew would be given to him in their shared apartment, not that it mattered since he was sure he’d still be working there even without payment if Taekwoon had so wished.

“Ready.” The elder said a little breathlessly, smiling at Taekwoon before both men had begun heading out, knowing the rising sun would be waiting to greet them just beyond the doorway. But Hakyeon was stopped when his friend had placed his hand out in front of him, motioning for him to wait whilst he tilted his head to the side much like at the beginning of their night. Moments passed and Hakyeon wanted to ask what was the matter, goosebumps rising on his skin as they often did whenever Taekwoon got like this, as if he had some kind of extra sense that left them all at his mercy.

The lights suddenly turning off didn’t help either, though he told himself it was just Hongbin in the back using the master switches to turn off the electricity for the day. Still, he waited. A few moments more and Taekwoon was lowering his hand, a rare and soft apology dripping from his lips as he reached for the door handle, fingertips barely touching the metal before it was turning down on its own. Stepping forward to half shield Taekwoon, Hakyeon automatically had one of his hands wrapped around the younger’s wrist, holding him in place whilst their eyes adjusted to the morning sun.

Standing there and half bathing in the sunshine, half blocking it was a young man. He looked younger than Hakyeon and Taekwoon, but it couldn’t be by much. He didn’t seem lost, neither did he seem all that interested in Hakyeon, his gaze barely meeting that of the elder’s before it was craning around to see Taekwoon just behind him. Of course Hakyeon inched in further, trying to shield his friend as he stared up at the stranger, about to ask him if he could help and inform him that the Shangri-La was closed, but the man beat him to it.

“I’m looking for Leo.” Leo? There was no Leo here.  
“I’m sorry but you’ve got the wrong-”  
“Here-” Hakyeon blinked when Taekwoon had spoken and stepped out from behind him, his wrist slipping from his grip that suddenly felt icy cold, like the room had dropped several degrees lower than before. Hakyeon didn’t like this, whatever this was, he didn’t like it one bit.  
“What? Taek stop- We don’t know this guy. Look at him, what’s he doing up at six in the morning in downtown Seoul anyway? Doesn’t look like a fisherman to me.” Who dyed their hair the coloured of Nerds candy anyway?

No. Hakyeon didn’t like this one little bit and he wanted to grab his friend’s hand, drag him past this man and head right for home where this day could finally be over.  
“Leo…” The stranger murmured, finally able to get a good view of the man in front of him, the one he had been looking for. Taekwoon glanced back at Hakyeon quietly before he hesitantly turned back to the man at the door, a whirlwind of butterflies swirling up in his stomach as he found himself staring into those oddly coloured eyes. It took everything he had to find his voice and speak up a little louder this time.

“It’s me.”

The eldest didn’t like the odd choice of phrasing one little bit. Why didn’t he just say something like ‘I’m Leo’? Not ‘It’s me’, that had so many connotations to it he wasn’t sure he wanted to even begin unpacking what those words could mean. Who was Leo anyway? In the decades of friendship Hakyeon shared with Taekwoon he had never heard of such a nickname for the younger. So why was he claiming this identity in such… such an intimate way?

Abort.

Hakyeon needed to stop this before it went any further. The bile rising up in the back of his throat was enough of an indication for him to know when enough was enough.

“Excuse us.” The eldest half hissed, snatching Taekwoon’s wrist up into his palm, tugging him along roughly and having to give him several yanks when the younger’s feet would dig in or trip over themselves, his eyes on the stranger and the stranger alone. _He knew him_. Hakyeon hated the realisation and tried swallowing it down, his throat burning from the bile or perhaps the denial and scorching jealousy he was giving into. No- He was doing this for his friend... Right?

Thankfully the stranger seemed to stunned, whether it was by seeing Taekwoon or by the sudden actions he didn’t know (or care) but it was the time he needed to get Taekwoon away from the man. But even if Hakyeon managed to have dragged the younger off so unceremoniously behind him at a quickened pace, he couldn’t help but hear the whispers echo in his ears, taunting him, mocking his very friendship and all he thought he knew about Taekwoon.

_Leo._

_It’s me._

Nightmares to cry by, Hakyeon thought as they disappeared off between dank alleyways. Clustered buildings sleeping precariously atop one another, threatening to fall in on the pair in their moment of escape. Just like how Hakyeon felt their friendship was beginning to shake with the threat of collapsing in on itself.

 

**_“Oh you don’t you talk about us.”_ **


	2. Trigger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 1am and I'm sure I'll be cringing at the typos later. A bit of a slower chapter but needed. Enjoy.
> 
> -Porcelain.

_**“All I can do is wait for you.”** _

More silence proceeded to follow Hakyeon as the pair had arrived at their shared apartment. He’d waited as patiently as he could for Taekwoon to take the time he’d offered him to speak up, to say anything or to even just give him a look that could say more than words ever would, but no. Nothing. Radio silence and it was driving Hakyeon _mad_. He’d stood by the doorway as he watched his friend, seeing how Taekwoon went about his usual routine of slipping off his shoes, neatly tucking them to the side by the door and shrugging off his suit jacket, laying it over the back of his armchair before rolling up those white sleeves of his. It was as if nothing had happened, and if there was one thing that Hakyeon absolutely detested, it was when people ignored problems or big events and tried sweeping them under the carpet without even addressing them. It pissed him off and his best friend was very close to being on the receiving end of that anger.

“So are you just going to pretend nothing happened?” Hakyeon muttered as he trailed behind Taekwoon to the kitchen, his footfalls loud and stomp-like whilst the younger’s couldn’t be heard at all. But he was met with a mere glance from Taekwoon, the man holding his friend’s gaze before he turned back to the faucet, pouring himself a glass of water and sipping from it whilst he loosened the tie around his neck.  
“ _Taekwoon_.” From the tone of his voice, it was clear that Hakyeon was at the end of his tether, so desperate he reached out and grabbed Taekwoon’s wrist, the word ‘ _Please_ ’ uttered moments after and barely above that of a whisper.  
“There’s nothing to tell you.” Came the reply, the room falling so silent then that a smallest of pins could have been dropped and it would have sounded like a violent thunderstorm to Hakyeon.

“Are you being serious right now? I’m asking for real because I don’t understand you, Taek. Why won’t you just open up and-”  
“There’s nothing to tell you. Its my decision, Hakyeon.” Taekwoon snapped, the most emotion the elder had seen in his friend’s face since they’d bumped into that stranger. Stupid stranger with his even stupider hair colour choices. Hakyeon knew it was petty but when he literally had not much more than that to go by, he took what he got and would let his feelings be known. Though, and as much as he hated to admit it, Taekwoon had a point. It was his decision whether or not he told the elder what he wanted, especially when it came to personal things.

But it left Hakyeon feeling so terribly alone as he stared up at the younger, his fingers around his wrists feeling as if they were burning from the hold he knew deep down he had no right to either. The only time he’d felt this alone before was when Taekwoon had physically been vacant from his life for… seven years? It’d been one of the hardest times of Hakyeon’s life and he hadn’t forgotten a damn single moment of it, watching the months tick by agonisingly slow, seasons come and go and everything move on whilst he was stuck wanting his best friend back. That was when he, when they were both seventeen, now they were both nearly thirty and Hakyeon felt like a lost little boy all over again.  
“Taek _please_.” Hakyeon hated how shaky his voice sounded, how his fingers tightened around Taekwoon’s wrist when the younger made any vague gesture of trying to pull away from him. He was desperate, he knew that, he felt it in his bones and the more he tried to grasp for Taekwoon, the more the man seemed to slip between his fumbling fingers.

“Enough! I don’t want to talk about it. That’s my right, Hakyeon. Sorry to break it to you, but I still have those, even as your friend.” Taekwoon tugged his wrist out of the other man’s hold, glaring at him with those cat-like orbs before he hissed and dumped the glass of water back in the sink. Pulling his own hand back and cradling it like it had been strung, Hakyeon could feel tears in his eyes as the silence began to ring in his ears all over again, making him whimper quietly in response. He was losing Taekwoon.  
“Stop it... “ Taekwoon whispered, running a hand through his grey-white locks before he slid the same hand down his face, covering his mouth and letting his eyelids close with a particular kind of fatigue lacing them.

Taekwoon hated whenever he fought with Hakyeon, it always made him feel unreasonably upset as if he had ever done something wrong in the first place. He was allowed his secrets, he was allowed to reserve some things from his friend, wasn’t he? They weren’t partners, they weren’t lovers, they didn’t need to spill out every little detail of their lives. But he knew, Taekwoon knew that the seven year gap kept Hakyeon up at night and wondering ceaselessly about the things that had happened in his absence. Sighing as he lowered his hand from his mouth to his hip, the younger looked at Hakyeon quietly and saw the man holding back tears, causing his own chest to tighten with a mixture of frustration and guilt. He had to do something, say something to make this even the tiniest bit better.

“Hakyeon… You know I don’t keep things from you with the intention of upsetting you. God knows that’s the last thing I want.” Reaching out for his hyung’s hands, Taekwoon found them and brought them into his own large palms, linking their fingers with one another whilst he sighed heavily. Something he seemed to do quite a lot around his best friend.  
“I know… Its just that- I just… I get scared and I’m worried you’re going to disappear again, Taek. I can’t- I can’t have you do that to me again.” Hakyeon admitted between sobs that had finally freed themselves, large tears rolling down his cheeks and collecting at his jaw before eventually dripping off onto his shirt. They left dark blotches on the fabric, shapes that Taekwoon found himself staring at in some attempt to find the right words that wouldn’t harm his friend any more.  
“What happened when I disappeared, it wasn’t planned. I’d never have left you without a serious need to do so. But I can’t talk about those years, Hakyeon. I just… _can’t_.” ‘ _Even if there are skeletons rattling around in my closet coming to say hello_ ’, Taekwoon added on silently, searching his hyung’s eyes to see if he had brought him a sliver of comfort at least.

And he had. Hakyeon hugged him and cried a little bit more, Taekwoon wiping at his tears and cooing for him to hush, that everything was fine between them and always would be. But he couldn’t bring himself to tell him anymore, and it seemed that at least this time around, Hakyeon was willing to bite on his tongue and not ask any more questions.

For now.

  
  
  
  


          “I see Mystery Man is back again.” Hongbin chirped, pouring what seemed like endless bottles into a single glass, the colours inside swirling around and looking somewhere between neon and toxic. Hakyeon lazily glanced up from the glass of water he had been chugging on his five minute break, spotting that head of hair he was feeling an increasing and unexplained contempt for. He glanced at the dimpled bartender who didn’t seem as bothered by the man’s presence, said being sitting at a table on his own fairly close to the stage and just off centre so he could see Taekwoon’s profile. As far as Hakyeon had seen, he hadn’t interacted with the pianist since he’d walked back in a few days after their initial meeting. Of course the eldest had tried to insist they throw him out, but without proper grounds to do so, and Taekwoon not wanting to, he had been allowed to stay much to the dislike of a very disgruntled Hakyeon.

“I don’t like him.”  
“No really.” Hongbin snorted, glancing at his hyung before he threw the same gaze over to Taekwoon at the piano.  
“Boss seems fine with him. And his senses are usually dead on about the patrons, you know he’s picky.” It was true, Taekwoon didn’t just let anyone in here and if they became a problem, their plucky young bouncer was always on the case.  
“I don’t know how, but he’s too close to the situation. Why does Nerds keep on coming back when Taekwoon hasn’t even spoken to him?” A deep frown pulled Hakyeon’s brows together as he glared at the patron, the man apparently sensing the stare as he looked over, but not for long before his own gaze was returning to the sight of the pianist.  
“Don’t upset Taekwoon. You remember what happened the last time you did. Shangri-La was shut for a whole week because you two were too stubborn to talk for that long.”  
“Would have been longer if I didn’t cave first.” Hakyeon tutted, rinsing out his glass before he was rounding his way out from behind the bar and taking a full tray of fresh drinks over to a few tables.

Tonight was the usual buzz for a Friday night. The place always felt a little bit smaller because they put out a few extra tables that took up the space left, Taekwoon monopolising on the surplus of souls that always seemed more listless at the beginning of the weekend and wound up in his little abode. As usual, Hakyeon was run off of his feet with orders and wondered why they hadn’t hired another person yet, even if a small part of him knew his pride would have taken a knock should Taekwoon think he needed the assistance. Still, it left the waiter feeling exhausted a good couple hours before the sun was rising and they were getting ready to close.

“I don't care, halve my paycheck but get another waiter. My calluses have calluses.” Hakyeon whined as he sat atop one of the chairs, shoes off and rubbing at the afflicted limbs. He’d been so busy with the last closing rush of drinks and cleaning up that it had been Hongbin to point out Taekwoon talking to Nerds at the door, speaking in hushed voices and making the waiter wonder if that was because of him. Hakyeon turned back to Hongbin as if looking for confirmation but found the man only shrugging and disappearing off to the back. Coward, Hakyeon thought.

Turning his attention back to the pair, he slipped his shoes back on his feet without leaving the sight in front of him even once, his nostrils flaring when he saw Nerds boy handing Taekwoon a folded piece of paper. He had no doubt it was contact information and he was barely able to withhold a growl when the man had glanced in his direction and actually had the audacity to smile at him before finally leaving.  
“Doesn’t he know when to leave on time like everyone else?” Hakyeon muttered as he came over to Taekwoon, the younger either having not heard his comment or deciding to do a good job of ignoring it. He’d wanted to get a little peek at the piece of paper but of course Takewoon had tucked it away in his pants pocket before he even had a chance.

“Everything’s all in order, Boss Man.” Sanghyuk grinned as he spoke, having popped his head around the door.  
“Not coming in for a drink?” Hongbin asked, Hakyeon vaguely wondering when he’d reappeared as he looked at the bouncer for his answer.  
“Not tonight. I have a date!” The man half sang, causing his three hyungs to raise their eyebrows in unison.  
“Which reminds me.  Boss I’m going to be a tiiiiiny bit late for my next shift but I promise I’ll make up for it. Goodnight!” And before anyone could respond the youngest was back out the door and leaving a ringing silence behind him.

“So of course the youngest is getting the most action.” Hakyeon quipped, Hongbin following up soon after.  
“Wonder if they’re nice, boy or girl, could never tell what he was attracted to.” The eldest held up his hands to show a sign of defeat, feeling he perhaps knew the least about the youngest.  
“Looks like someone else is going on a date too.” The dimpled man murmured, pointedly looking at Taekwoon who had been quietly fussing this entire time, checking the time, his reflection and more, Hakyeon squinting the moment he saw those foreign actions of his. Taekwoon didn’t go on dates. He didn’t even date!  
“Where-”  
“Don’t wait up for me today. I’ll be in for work as usual but I’ll be home closer towards the shift.” Taekwoon cut his friend off, Hakyeon looking for backup from Hongbin but the man had of course disappeared out back again.

Before Hakyeon had even had the chance to say anything his best friend was out that door like a shot, leaving behind a very disheartened young man in his place.

  
  
  
  


          “Hey Hakyeon? I’m done with the back for the night. Can you manage the rest on your own?” Hongbin stopped behind the elder’s chair, resting a hand on the man’s shoulder, wondering what shot of whiskey this was in his hand. Hongbin thought the man always overreacted to the slightest of changes in Taekwoon, but then, Hongbin had never had a connection and friendship like he had observed his hyungs to have. So perhaps he wasn’t the best judgement in such situations.  
“I’ll be fine. You go on home.” Hakyeon mumbled with his lips against the cool glass, leaving Hongbin to sigh and wonder if it was really a good idea to leave the man like that.

Glancing at his watch, Hongbin felt fatigue winning out in this situation, the time almost seven in the morning and more than time for his pretty little head to be resting on a nice, soft pillow. Yeah, Hakyeon would be fine.  
“See you tomorrow.” The bartender murmured, clapping his hand over his hyung’s shoulder before heading for the exit. Hakyeon vaguely heard the sound of the door opening and closing at the younger’s exit, sighing to himself as he lifted his glass and swirled the honey coloured liquid around. Letting his head loll back over the back of his chair, the waiter looked up at the ceiling and traced the patterns there with his eyes, trying to block out incessant images of Taekwoon trying to bombard his poor mind.

It was the the creak of the door opening again that had him speaking up, pinching the bridge of his nose as he did so.  
“Forget something, Hongbin?”  
“Actually, I was hoping to find someone to talk to. Is the owner around?” Almost falling out of his chair when he realised it wasn’t Hongbin, Hakyeon scrambled to look at the stranger, peering at the man who stood there in the doorway. He looked perfectly at ease, an open demeanour and a welcoming face too, even if he had those silly slits in his eyebrows (a recent dislike for Hakyeon thanks to Nerds). But there seemed nothing malicious about the man, nothing that had Hakyeon on edge past his initial surprise.  
“The owner is gone and the bar is closed. You can come back at midnight though if you want to talk to him.”

He brushed his hands off over the front of his shirt as he explained, eyeing the stranger for a moment more before he followed his gaze to the bottle of whiskey on the table and the glass still in his hand.  
“Oh- Really I was hoping to talk to someone before I left.” The man said, disappointment lacing his words so thickly that Hakyeon couldn’t help but to feel a little bit bad about it. But another voice in his head was telling him he should have gone home earlier. But… as usual, Hakyeon decided to ignore it.  
“Well I’ll be off then.”  
“Wait-” The whiskey sloshed over Hakyeon’s hand as he had reached out to the stranger’s, cursing under his breath before he placed the tumbler on the table.  
“Please, have a seat. I might be able to help you. Whiskey?” Hakyeon blinked as the man handed him a handkerchief for his troubles, the elder wondering what kind of person even kept such things on their person any more.

“Double vodka, no ice.” Of course the waiter thought it was on the heavier side of things to be drinking at seven in the morning, but who was he to judge when he had been drinking himself to the bottom of a bottle of whiskey for no apparent reason. Well, other than the suspicion of his friend going on a date and keeping secrets from him.  
“Here you go.” Hakyeon placed the glass down in front of his impromptu guest, taking his seat opposite him and thanking him again for the handkerchief.  
“Thanks uh-”  
“Please, call me Ken.” Said man held up his hand when the elder was thanking him needlessly, the foreign name for what had begun to feel like a familiar presence seemed to ring little warning bells at the back of Hakyeon’s mind. They didn’t last long, numbed and silenced by the warm thrumming of the alcohol setting in his system.  
“So what can I help you with?” The waiter prompted, already having noticed the odd shape of the man’s ears, elf-like in quality and that nose that looked a little too big for his face. And as friendly as he seemed there was one feeling, a jumble of words on the tip of his tongue he just couldn’t get right and straighten out just yet.

His thoughts were brushed aside when Ken had leaned in, smiling all too sweetly at the man who suddenly felt a little too defenseless in the situation, but a certain _lack_ of wanting to change it either.  
“Nothing of… major importance. But I was hoping to ask a few questions about the boss, since he’s not here… would you do that for me, Hakyeon?” The elder found himself staring for a moment or two even after Ken had finished speaking, nodding his head in a dumb fashion and telling himself it was definitely just the whiskey, that he certainly wasn’t having this affect happen on him because a pair of big eyes were looking at him like that.  
“Yes- Yes I’ll tell you. Ask me-” Hakyeon almost sounded desperate as he spoke those last words, those little alarms in his mind returning as he stared at the other man, some part of him telling himself this was some childish attempt to rile of Taekwoon too, should he ever find out about this encounter.

It was odd, as Hakyeon looked at Ken, that feeling of familiarity never ceasing and only making him feel a strange mix of being on edge and a fiery curiosity at the same time. The more dramatic side of Hakyeon wondered if this was what it felt like to sit with the Devil, to look into his eyes and want to tell him all your secrets, all your fears and hopes and dreams- And even when he did end up answering Ken’s questions, and far, far more, even watched Ken leave the establishment with a sweet smile on his face… There was one statement that kept on blaring around the insides of his poor mind. It even remained when Ken was long gone and the sun was high up in the sky:

When had he ever told Ken his name?

_**“I handed over my everything, oh baby, helplessly to you.”** _


	3. Escape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 2am. I'm tired as heck thanks to the single glass of wine I had but felt the need to update this. Sorry in advance for the mistakes, will come back and edit after some sleep. But for now, enjoy!
> 
> -Porcelain.

 

_**“My relief was more important than your pain.”** _

“What do you mean you haven’t heard from Hakyeon?” It was fifteen minutes before opening time at the Shangri-La and no one had seen the waiter. No one had even heard from him all day which was highly unusual considering he was the main cause for their chatroom to be as active as it was. Taekwoon had tried messaging him, phoned him (multiple times) and left more than a few increasingly angry voicemails.  
“You saw him last night, didn’t you? Leaving here?” The man tossed his phone down on the bar, Hongbin barely even flinching as he glanced up from the glass he had been cleaning, he and Sanghyuk who, was currently being questioned, looking unbothered compared to their boss.  
“He’s probably just running a little later if he went drinking last night.” Hongbin ventured the answer, though the hard look he got from his hyung told him keeping his mouth shut unless it was going to spring the missing man from it was probably the better option.

Sanghyuk threw a questioning look over to the bartender, the newest of the bunch, he had never seen the elder lose his control over worrying about someone and as interesting as it was to watch, it also made him feel rather on edge himself.  
“I’m sure he’ll be here soon. Maybe his phone died on the way to work, yeah, that’s gotta be it.” Again, Taekwoon had someone shrinking beneath the hard look in those cat-like orbs of his, the man turning his back on the other two whilst he seemed to be muttering to himself quietly. His poor bottom lip was worried endlessly between his teeth, swelling just slightly and glistening red as his tongue swiped out between the lines listlessly.  
“Why don’t you tell us how last night went instead? I’m sure Hakyeon’s radar will go off and he’ll be in here like a shot when he knows there’s gossip afoot.” As annoying as it was to admit, Hongbin had a point about the waiter who always seemed to show up when there was something considered ‘juicy’ as a topic circulating between the coworkers.

“There’s nothing to tell you. I just went out for the day.” Taekwoon had sorely missed out on the sleep he needed, a lack of which was doing no favours for his temperament. Taekwoon caught the look his employees shared, reading it clear as day in their expressions that they didn’t believe him for a single minute, but he didn’t have time to snap at them, he was worried about Hakyeon. He might have had a hard time showing that he was genuinely worried for the elder man sometimes, but he was someone he’d known for a long time and whilst he had his secrets and skeletons in his closet, he’d do anything to protect Hakyeon.

Now, Taekwoon couldn’t quite explain it but he always got these little niggling feelings inside of him. Ones that reminded him when things didn’t seem quite right and and there had been more than one occasion which proved listening to those voices in his mind were the better option. This was one of those times and the voices were becoming louder, more insistent for him to go and to find Hakyeon, to bring him home safely before something awful happened. Glancing over at the other two, Taekwoon knew there was no point telling either of them such a thing, that they would dismiss him as some old worrywort and remind him that Hakyeon was more than capable of taking care of himself. Which was true, but then there were some things, some people that Taekwoon didn’t ever want resurfacing in his new life he had made for himself, let alone for those ghosts to come looking for his friend.

Taekwoon had begun grabbing his things, about to tell the other two that the Shangri-La would be closed for the night as he would satisfy these incessant needs to go and check for himself. Then there would be no guilt to be left hanging over his head. But just as Taekwoon had been heading for the door, the handle had swung open away from him, the cool, crisp air from outside sweeping in and a familiar face coming in with it.

  
  
  
  


          “How did I manage to get the cold treatment? I wasn’t even late!” Hakyeon complained as he propped up the last chair on the now empty tables. The night had gone by surprisingly quickly and the man wasn’t sure if he was grateful for it or not. He’d not had a single moment to talk to Taekwoon, and as grateful as he was that the shift had gone by as fast as it had, he was less than happy about the cold looks he’d been getting and the long silences.

He always much preferred when Taekwoon had something to snap at him for.

“He was pretty worried about you. Frantic even.” Hongbin interjected as the eldest had found his way over to the bar the younger was cleaning up, watching as the waiter slouched over a stool and looked at him like some kind of kicked puppy. Sighing softly to himself, Hongbin wondered sometimes if he should be paid far more than he currently was considering how much he dealt with that wasn’t just tricky customers and their orders.  
“It’s clear he’s closest with you. And I don’t know what kind of history the two of you have, but it’s clearly something strong and important, especially to him. When you think about the kind of work we do and how we’re not in exactly the safest of places, yeah, I can see why he was worried.” Hakyeon knew he was right. Ducking his head down he avoided Hongbin’s gaze as he thought back to how his night had ended up, spending countless hours talking to the stranger right here in the bar.

Leaning over the counter, Hakyeon unhooked his his phone from the charger cable he had borrowed, waiting for his phone to start up whilst peering over his own shoulder as discreetly as he could in Taekwoon’s direction. Said man seemed busy hunched over a couple of folders, the end of the month meaning he was doing one last stock check and payment scheduling before he would pay the bills to make sure his beloved Shangri-La would keep up and running for another month. At the sound of his phone starting back up, Hakyeon looked down at the blaringly bright screen, turning the obnoxious brightness down before he felt his phone vibrate for several moments, catching up with the missed notifications he had received. Sure enough there were messages, missed calls and enough voicemails that his inbox was now full, that alone making Hakyeon smile a little guiltily to himself.

Though he’d never admit it, he liked the idea of Taekwoon being so protective of him, showing in his own little way that he cared about him and was worried enough that he’d apparently almost shut the bar for the night to come looking for him.  
“Don’t forget to lock the front when you leave.” Hakyeon vaguely heard Hongbin, not looking up from his phone as he just waved the man off for the night, eyes glued to the screen in front of him as he was reminded of why his battery had run out last night and why he’d been up so late to leave him feeling as dog tired as he did now.

Ken.

The message was from an unknown number, Hakyeon still needing to add the man’s actual name, but he knew it was him all the same.

 _Hope you got home safe!_  
Sorry I kept you out so late…  
I could have spoken to you for hours tbh.  
Hope to see you soon?

Giddy wasn’t quite the right word Hakyeon would have used to describe how the messages made him feel. But it was the closest he could come to it.

 _Oh._  
This is Ken btw.  
Just in case you forgot-

Hakyeon had been chuckling to himself at the man’s adorable demeanour even through text when he’d been so suddenly interrupted.  
“What are you smiling at? Oho- Does hyung have a crush?” Before he could retaliate, Sanghyuk had swiped the phone right out of the elder’s hand and was holding it right out of his reach whilst he looked over the message for himself.  
“Give that back right now, you overgrown brat.” Hakyeon complained as he tugged on the younger’s arm, to no avail though as Sanghyuk snickered and held the device up a little bit higher just to taunt his hyung.  
“Oh whoa. Some guy is flirting with you, hyung.” Snatching his phone back when the younger held it just low enough, Hakyeon saw to straightening out his shirt and brushing some of his hair back as if he wasn’t just fighting to get a cellphone back from his friend.  
“First of all, it’s not flirting. Secondly, why’d you assume it was a guy?”  
“They text like a dude. Plus, you’re gay as hell, hyung. Don’t know why you’d give your number to a lady.”

Hakyeon wanted to say something, anything, but like a gaping fish his mouth could only open and close several times without a single sound passing through his lips.  
“What’s going on now?” Taekwoon half sighed as he had approached the pair silently, setting his files down on the bar counter before he peered over his glasses at the men, nudging the frames up his nose as he was reminded of why he preferred contacts so much more.  
“Nothing-”  
“Hakyeon hyung is dating someone.” Sanghyuk blurted, shrugging when the eldest gave him an incredulous look, the youngest waving his way out and promising to see them tomorrow night as usual.

Silence fell over the two men left, Hakyeon pretty sure he was sweating so much his friend could see the beads of perspiration rolling down his temples. Maybe it was all in his mind because Taekwoon never said anything about it, and he just continued to stare at the elder, seemingly waiting for some kind of explanation.  
“Oh I’m not dating anyone. It’s just someone I met last night.” A small ‘Mnh’ was all he got in return, watching as Taekwoon disappeared into one of the back rooms only to reappear, flicking off the light switches as he did so, all but one left now.  
“Really. Actually he came here looking for you.” Hakyeon had completely forgotten how the whole thing had even begun, his gaze back on his phone as he finally replied to Ken’s texts as quickly as possible, adding in his name under his contacts too.

“They came looking for… me?” Tilting his head, that same unsettling feeling now returned to Taekwoon’s stomach, standing beside Hakyeon at the bar counter and frowning at him just a bit. He didn’t have very many visitors, the only people he was close enough to even consider being his friends were those he employed because Taekwoon liked one thing more than anything in his life - control. He controlled, in some sense, his relationship with Hongbin and Sanghyuk and even Hakyeon to a degree. He’d learned from a young age that the world revolved around power and money, and that if you were going to feel safe, if he was ever going to feel safe, then he would need some kind of control of those around him and should a friendship blossom from that, then so be it. But he was never one to go actively seeking acceptance and kindness from people. That just wasn’t Taekwoon.

That didn’t, however, mean that he didn’t care when you _did_ become his friend.

“Well yeah. He arrived not long after you ran-” Catching himself, Hakyeon bit his tongue before trying again.  
“Not long after you and your friend went off. He was asking for the owner of the bar but I said you were gone.”  
“And he just… stayed?” Was that disgust in Taekwoon’s tone? Hakyeon couldn’t quite tell.  
“No… Well not quite. I invited him to stay if I could help. He said he was writing some kind of guide to unique bars around Seoul and he’d heard about Shangri-La so he was hoping for an interview with you but, well, you weren’t here. He said he’d be back to try again though.” Taekwoon didn’t like this one little bit, everything in him screaming that something was amiss and his friend had been foolish enough to let it slip past him.  
“Did I do something wrong?” Hakyeon asked, having risen from his perch to now step closer to his friend, reaching a hand out and resting it on the man’s shoulder.

Did he do something wrong? Taekwoon felt like he had but there was no rational reason for him to say so. Sighing he walked away from the man, heading towards the doorway and fishing the keys out of his pocket, Hakyeon quick to follow like an obedient puppy.  
“Taekwoon. Did I do something-”  
“No.” It was really amazing how just a single word could bring Hakyeon to complete silence, especially when considering what he was usually like. He’d been about to press further when the uncanny feeling of someone behind behind them as Taekwoon had locked up made Hakyeon glance over his shoulder curiously.

“Ken.”  
“What?” Taekwoon muttered, shaking the lock a little before he was turning around and looking at Hakyeon, but the man wasn’t looking at him.  
“Hi there.” Barely glancing at the stranger, Taekwoon was so irritated at being interrupted he simply snapped back in a tired tone.  
“We’re closed. Come back at midnight. Let’s go home.” Tugging on Hakyeon’s sleeve, the elder began leading the pair of them away, or tried to, but his hand soon lost its grip on the elder’s sleeve when he didn’t move from his spot. Exasperated and certainly not in the mood for any games, Taekwoon stared at the other man before he finally took the time to take in the face of the man that had Hakyeon so wrapped up in awe or surprise.  
“This is Ken, the visitor I told you about last night.” Hakyeon explained but his voice was drowned out by a deafening white noise, roaring in Taekwoon’s ears as he felt his limbs stiffen. As if his blood had turned from hot pumping liquid full of life to a solid, Taekwoon couldn’t move an inch, his eyes on the man in front of him before he was shaking his head.

“Taekwoon? Taekwoon say hello. I’m so sorry, he’s not usually like this.” Hakyeon apologised, gripping his boss’s elbow and shaking it a little, as if in some hope that would pull him from his stupor. But it did nothing. Taekwoon was still there, stone cold as he stared into Ken’s eyes, eyes that transported him back to the part of his life he had tried to forget and never bring anywhere near his best friend. But here it was, right on his doorstep and so close too. So dangerously close.  
“Taekwoon, say hello to-”  
“Go home, Hakyeon.” Blinking in surprise, Hakyeon shook his head softly at the demand but when Taekwoon turned his head and glared right through to his soul, he knew he’d be in a lot more shit if he didn’t do as he was told.

“No. No I’m staying. What’s going on?” He could feel Taekwoon’s gaze boring holes into his back but he didn’t care, not when he was sensing something more was afoot here than appeared to the naked eye. Whatever it was, it made Hakyeon feel like an outsider, as if he was missing something vital here and in all honesty - he was. Hakyeon’s gaze flitted to Ken who had been awfully quiet this entire time, a smile ever present on his face that until now, hadn’t really bothered the elder all that much before.  
“Hakyeon, now isn’t the time for you to be playing big boy. Go home.”  
“Oh come on, Leo. Let him stay.” There was that infernal nickname again, one that Hakyeon still didn’t know where or why people called him it for. First Wonshik, now Ken-  
“Last chance, leave us alone.”

Honestly Taekwoon didn’t know himself why Ken seemed to be setting off so many alarms. He felt, he knew him from somewhere but his mind was drawing a blank on anything past them having met one another in those long years he’d spent astray from Hakyeon. Years he was regretting tenfold tonight.  
“Is that any way at all to greet an old friend?” This man was no friend, if he was Taekwoon’s hair wouldn’t have been standing up on end at his neck and he certainly wouldn’t have been feeling as sick to his stomach as he was now. He wanted to scream at Hakyeon to run, to go before he could get caught up in more of these things, the life that Taekwoon had been happily forgetting each night here at his Shangri-La. No more suffering. No more pain. And yet the presence of just one man was shaking the core of years of hard work in a matter of minutes, hours if you included last night.

“This is who you were with last night?” Although a question it was clear Taekwoon wasn’t looking for an answer, his eyes trained on Ken as said man shifted from foot to foot, the only comfortable looking one in the current predicament.  
“Don’t you wonder why everything seems so… fuzzy, these days, little lion?” Ken had begun pacing back and forth in front of the two men, pulling the gloves free from his hands before he pointed to Taekwoon and then turned his hand over, holding it out as if in offering for the elder to take.  
“Just take it. I can help you remember. Come on, Leo… You never had a problem trusting me before.”  
“No- I don’t know you.” Taekwoon insisted, but his voice sounded weak and fragile, unsure in his own ears.  
“What’s he talking about, Taek…? You know him?” Hakyeon was still glancing between the two, trying to push the pieces together and only becoming further frustrated when he was left with more questions than answers.  
“N-No- No of course I don’t know him.” Lifting a hand to his head, Taekwoon leaned against the locked door behind him as he tried to desperately wade through the fog of his mind for answers. Why was Ken so familiar?  
“Does he still drink those awful red laced concoctions?” Shooting his gaze over to Ken, Hakyeon wondered how he knew about the habits of his friend so well, especially about what he decided to ingest on a nightly basis.

Nodding his head in a dumb fashion, Hakyeon didn’t know what else to say, simply watching as Ken made a small ‘Ahh’ sound as if it explained everything at once.  
“Come on, little lion. Leo, you know you can trust me.” Standing a little closer to the man in question, Hakyeon wrapped a protective arm around the man’s waist, propping him up and away from the locked door behind him. When he brushed away those greyish locks from his face, he saw a pale mumbling and incoherent mess there, his eyes unseeing and blank whilst he murmured strange words, some Hakyeon was pretty sure weren’t even in any known language.  
“I have to get him home. I’m sorry, but maybe come back another time.” Hakyeon ducked his head, showing an apologetic bow before he began walking himself and Taekwoon around Ken, heading for they usual alleyway that led towards home.

“Its alright, Taek. We’ll be home soon.” Small ‘no’s left Taekwoon’s mouth, all of which Hakyeon decided were probably best to ignore in his given state. He had checked to see if Ken was still there, but the man hadn’t budged from his spot in front of the bar, as if he were going to really stay there the entire day and wait for them to return. At least he wasn’t following them.  
“No…” Taekwoon whispered, his hand curling into the front of Hakyeon’s shirt as he had spoken up loud enough for the elder to hear him better this time.  
“We’re going home whether you like it or not. You’re in no shape to be dealing with people.” Of course Hakyeon was so busy worrying about getting his friend home that he hadn’t noticed the soft pleads of ‘No’ weren’t for him to stop taking them home, but were instead directed at the man who had been following them.

“Nearly there. You’re doing great.” Hakyeon chimed, stopping outside their apartment to lean Taekwoon against his side a bit better, using his free hand to try punching in the code to their apartment.  
“No.” Taekwoon whimpered, looking delirious from god knows what as he slide the catch over the number pad down, causing his hyung to withdraw his hand and shake it about as his fingers had been scraped a little.  
“Taekwoon come on. Let me get us inside.” Trying for the second time had the same result, but by the third time he’d kept Taekwoon far enough away to make sure he couldn’t cause trouble again, all before heading inside.

Even as he was laid on the sofa, all Taekwoon could do was whisper the word ‘no’, over and over again like some broken mantra, eyes staring in a glassy fashion up at the ceiling which had the elder’s nerves feeling a little on the frazzled side. He’d never seen Taekwoon like this- Well, only once. When he had returned from his apparent and sudden hiatus in their friendship and lives in general, he’d come back in a similar state but had never been able to explain what had actually happened. This was just like that time and it had the waiter fussing around even more in his own attempt at being helpful in a situation he couldn’t help but feel a little guilty and responsible for.

Poor, poor Hakyeon. Hakyeon who had still failed to notice the lingering presence outside their apartment door, the one that had followed them all the way home from their Shangri-La. Someone that was suddenly making what was supposed to be heaven feel a little more like a sudden and more than unwelcome nightmare.

 

_**“I was eager to escape.”** _


	4. Odd Sense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait!

_**“Day by day the flowers wilt.”** _

Taekwoon wasn’t talking.

He’d miss another day’s worth of sleep, this time taking Hakyeon with him as the elder had been up throughout the day, watching his friend from afar. Hakyeon had tried everything. From coaxing him to speak, to trying to feed Taekwoon, bathe him, change his clothes, just trying to talk to him so desperately and all for what? None of it was making a difference, for the younger had stayed motionless aside a few sniffles now and then, incoherent mumbles that Hakyeon had long given up trying to make any sense of.

When things had gotten pretty bad he’d text Hongbin and Hyuk, giving them the briefest of rundowns about what had happened and asking if they could give advice or maybe even come try talk to him. Hakyeon wasn’t sure the Shangri-La was going to be opening that night. As Hakyeon was tiredly leaning against the hallway wall, eyes on Taekwoon curled up on the sofa and still mumbling to himself, he jumped at the sudden sound of their apartment door being knocked on, snagging his nail he’d been chewing on in the process. Hissing softly, the man frowned at his finger before pressing the home button on his phone - no notifications from their friends left him wondering if they had just decided to show up instead.

“Coming.” Hakyeon called as he threw one last, longing look at Taekwoon, his bare feet padding down the hallway and filling the eerily quiet apartment louder than he would have liked. Giving his finger one more look, the man sighed before opening the door, something that had him nearly being bowled over. In came Wonshik, the man frantic as he asked where Taekwoon was, said man seeming to perk up for the first time in hours as he heard the younger’s voice.  
“Wonshik.” He breathed, unfurling himself from the blankets and cushions but with no need, not when Wonshik was by his side in seconds, on his knees in front of his hyung and holding his hands in his own.  
“You’re frozen- Taekwoon- Oh Taekwoon…” Wonshik framed said man’s face in his hands as he knelt in front of him, soothing the whimpering man and hushing him softly.

All but forgotten, Hakyeon stayed on the outskirts, watching them both curiously though he had an edge of jealousy in his gaze for Wonshik, telling himself it was just his instincts telling him not to trust the man.  
“When you didn’t respond to me like you promised you would I knew something was wrong. I went to the bar and everything, the young one was there-”  
“Hyuk-” Hakyeon interjected.  
“Yeah him. He told me that he wasn’t sure you guys were even going to open Shangri-La tonight. So he told me where you lived and I’m so glad he did.” Hakyeon made a mental note to chew the maknae out for that later. Much later. Right now he was feeling more than a little uncomfortable all over again, like there was some intruder in his safe place he shared with his best friend and Hakyeon realised that yes, there was an intruder in his safe place.

Apparently he was the only one who felt like this though.

“I appreciate you coming here and worrying about him but Taekwoon will be fine. He just had a bit of a shock last night is all. I’ve been here looking after him.” Hakyeon hated how possessive he sounded, how his feet had edged him closer to the pair and how Wonshik didn’t even bother looking at him when he spoke. He wasn’t sure if the pair were just ignoring him or perhaps hadn’t heard him as they were so absorbed up in their own bubble, his jaw clenching before he strode even closer, only stopping when he was right beside Wonshik and staring down at him pointedly. Only then did the youngest look up, finally.  
“I’ll go if Taek wants me to go.” Hakyeon’s eyes widened at this before he looked expectantly at his best friend, clearly expecting him to pick his side.  
“Do you want me to go, Taekwoon?” It took barely a heartbeat before the man was shaking his silver tresses, signalling he didn’t want the man to go. But what hurt Hakyeon most, was how despite his efforts to comfort and help his best friend all through the night, not only did all of it seem fruitless but to see how Taekwoon clutched and clung to Wonshik like some child - that… that hurt the most.

“Then I’m staying.” The eldest could swear he heard the sound of windows shattering at those words, or maybe it was the fissures in his aching heart growing wider. He was reminded of the pain in his finger from his nail. Another thing he had to blame Wonshik for.  
“Fine.” Hakyeon all but hissed as he couldn’t stomach watching either of them for a moment more. It was mere moments before he was washed, changed and out the apartment with no more than a few words to say he’d probably be back in the evening, the tone in his voice making it clear he did not want to see Wonshik still here when he returned.

 

 

 

 

          Hakyeon was angry.

They’d opened the Shangri-La under his orders, though there would be no piano from the owner as usual, something some of the patrons grumbled and moaned about but none pushing it, especially when they saw how close to the edge their waiter seemed to be. When Hyuk had tried to venture over the topic about Taekwoon, Hongbin had given him a sharp jab in his side, shaking his head too and making a zipping motion across his lips to signal for the maknae to stop. Maybe it was guilt, maybe it was something else, but whilst the youngest had gone home once the shift was over, Hongbin had decided to stay with Hakyeon for a little while at least, wondering if he’d find any answers at the bottom of the shot glasses he was hurriedly beginning to pile up.  
“So am I going to just keep pouring you drinks or are you going to talk to me?” Hongbin arched an eyebrow as he spoke, tipping the nozzle of the matured whiskey Hakyeon was making a good dent in all by himself over the rim of his tumbler, watching as the amber liquid filled his glass.  
“Nothing to tell.” At the response, Hongbin snorted and placed the bottle down, folding his arms over his chest whilst he looked down at the man on the other side of his bar. He might not have shared the same closeness Hakyeon did with Taekwoon, but he deserved better than that crummy excuse for an answer. And Hakyeon knew it too. So with a drawn out sigh, the man lifted his glass and motioned in a toasting kind of manner to Hongbin, about to swig back his last dose of the stuff and explain what had happened until the reflection of the piano caught his attention.

Lowering his glass, Hakyeon glanced over his shoulder and looked at the instrument solemnly, thinking it looked so sad without its silver haired owner teasing the keys to make the most gorgeous of keening sounds. But it brought an entirely new thought, one that had an old question resurface so suddenly that if he weren’t so warmed and buzzed by the alcohol then he wouldn’t have asked.  
“What’s in the drinks you give to Taek?” This seemed to have caught the bartender by surprise, something Hakyeon noticed they didn’t really get to see much of, not when Hongbin always seemed to so put together and ready for just about anything.

“His drinks? The red ones? It's just a mixture of alcohols he likes. I think, if I’m remembering right, it was back when he hired me. I messed up the original drink he wanted but he tried the one I made anyway and since then he insisted I make it just for him.” A soft ‘Huh’ came from Hakyeon, the story sounded quirky enough to fit their Taekwoon perfectly. As he nodded at the answer, curiosity seeming sated, Hongbin wiped down the counter before he was caught off guard for the second time tonight.  
“Make me one.”  
“What?”  
“Make me one of the drinks you make Taek. I want it just like his, no changes.”  
“Hakyeon-”  
“Please?” There was a silence before Hongbin sighed and nodded, lifting his hand to show he would be doing it just the one time before he busied himself behind the counter.

With a soft groan, Hakyeon lowered his head unceremoniously to his arms folded atop the bar, a muffled ‘We’re closed’ coming from him as he heard the familiar squeaking of the front door. He really needed to bug Hyuk to put some WD-40 on it.  
“I’m sorry to bother you again, Hakyeon.” He knew that voice. Sure enough, as Hakyeon looked up he found Ken standing there, looking sheepish, tired but smiling nonetheless and rubbing at his nape. Grunting, the elder didn’t have time for this, not in his current state so he let his head fall back down on his arms, a move that led him to miss the shared, pensive look between Ken and Hongbin. The silence that had followed did have the waiter lifting his head briefly, frowning at the bartender before he vaguely waved at Ken, said man coming up by his side and taking a seat on one of the bar stools, eyes never leaving Hongbin’s figure though.

“Ken, Hongbin. Hongbin, Ken.” Hakyeon waved his hands around as he spoke, gesturing vaguely to both men before he was being coaxed to sit up, Hongbin hesitating before he slid the glass in front of his hyung.  
“One Leo special.” It wasn’t the drink’s actual name, but then, Hongbin never thought he’d actually be serving it up to anyone else other than his boss. Hongbin gave Ken one more wary look, frowning a little at him before he stepped back from the counter, Hakyeon still blissfully unaware of the tenseness in his surroundings then and there.  
“Pretty-” Hakyeon slurred slightly, his eyelids drooped half shut as he lifted the martini glass and admired how red it was. He brought the drink to his lips soon after, though the liquid only just touched his tongue, leaving him whining for more until Jaehwan had pulled it away, sloshing some of the contents on his own hand.

“Hey! If you want your own you have to ask Hongbin. You can’t s-steal mine.” A hiccup had interrupted Hakyeon’s speech, frowning as he wondered which of the two Ken’s he was seeing was the real one with his drink. No matter how hard he tried getting it back from him he couldn’t, instead giving up and tossing his head down in his hands, fingers tangling up in the dark locks there whilst he tugged at them.  
“How long are you going to keep this up?”  
“What?” Hakyeon had first thought that Ken was talking to him, but when he’d looked up he found both men were seeming to be having some kind of staring competition.  
“Hey- Hey stop… It was just a drink, Ken.”  
“No. No you have no idea what you’re dealing with here, Hakyeon. And I’m sick of watching him get away with the things he does.” Hakyeon hadn’t heard this side of Ken before, didn’t even realise he could have it in him in all honesty and it sent some unnerving chill up his spine.

Like he was missing something.

But he was talking about his friend, Hongbin, someone he’d known a lot longer than he had Ken. He couldn’t just let him talk like that about him.  
“Do you two know each other?” Hakyeon looked to Hongbin for answers, the man having been more quiet than usual, now taking his time to look the elder in the eye. Blaring sirens were going off in the back of Hakyeon’s mind, warning him that something wasn’t right, that he needed to get out of there and quickly but it wa all muffled, like Hakyeon’s head was in water and it left the warnings a more of a dull ache in his skull.

When the eldest tried to stand, he’d stumbled and landed back against the counter with a pained grunt, Ken’s hand on his back, another on his arm as he tried to steady him.  
“Careful, hyung. Those drinks will go right to your head.”  
“Shut up!” Hakyeon flinched at Ken suddenly snapping by his side, frowning as he looked over to Hongbin and where he thought he would have seen his friend’s worried expression, he saw no such thing. Nothing but a smirk and a menacing twinkle in his eyes, leaving Hakyeon feeling very unsettled and confused.  
“My head… My head is killing me-”

“It should be. They’re only meant for Taekwoon’s consumption, but you just had to go and ask. No less get this thing involved.” Hongbin gestured towards Ken who took a moment from trying to sooth Hakyeon to sneer at the bartender.

“Enough, Hongbin.”  
“Oh now you want to shut up? Well tough, you came back, you brought this on. You should have stayed away.” Hakyeon’s vision was blurring but he could still make out Hongbin’s expression, surprised at how much vehemence was held in it for just one person. Nothing made sense, not their words, not the way he was feeling with the drink… everything was wrong.  
“Wasn’t it enough for you? Wasn’t everyone else you had before enough? I should never have left you with Taekwoon but I refuse to let you ruin Hakyeon too.” Ken sounded a lot more braver than he felt, but he had to be, especially when he felt how the eldest had begun to shake in his hold, slumped over the bar counter.

“Ken- Ken what’s he talking about?” Fear turned to anger inside of Hakyeon, empty and hollow as it laced his words, voice rising in pitch out of fear.  
“What are you both talking about?!” Hakyeon tried lashing out but he’d only just managed to shove the one person who had been helping him away, Ken landing on his ass with a grunt. The elder realised his elbow throbbed slightly and when he looked at Ken on the floor he realised he’d knocked the man in his mouth, a thin trail of blood slipping from the corner of his lips and down to his jawline. He wiped it away, looking more sorry than angry at his hyung before he was scrambling to get up, Hakyeon now feeling a tightness around his own jaw only to find Hongbin reaching over the bar to hold him in his hand.  
“I had planned for this to be more of a long-term thing, Hakyeon. But I guess I’ll just have to do with what I’ve been given.”

As if he’d been given notice of some minor inconvenience, Hongbin sighed and slightly shoved the man’s face away as he released him, turning those cold, sadistic eyes back on Ken now. As the dimpled bartender pulled a gun from beneath the counter, Hakyeon made a small sound of fear whilst trying once more to utalise his body, though to no avail again as he was in danger of doing himself more harm than helping anyone else.  
“Sit and stay seated, before I redecorate this place with your brains.” Hongbin ordered, the nozzle of the gun now cocked and ready to go, pressing down on the centre of Hakyeon’s forehead.

He didn’t need to be told twice.

“Good boy. You’ll pass out soon enough, you have no resistance to it like Taekwoon does.” Sighing once more, Hongbin propped himself up against the counter on his elbows, turning the gun this way and that before he ran a finger over the barrel, a small smile appearing in a sinister fashion on his face moments after.  
“Do you remember them all, Ken? I mean, do you really remember them?” Ken who had found his feet was staring between Hakyeon and Hongbin as the latter spoke, his jaw tensed and hands turned into fists at his sides to hide how they shook.  
“I remember. I remember what we did, but I’ve never been able to forget the tiny details you’d put into them. I’ve not slept properly since then.” Ken admitted, guilt dragging his shoulders down slightly.

Hongbin seemed to think in the words before he disliked the way they felt in his mouth when he mouthed them wordlessly.  
“Well I guess you really should have thought of that before you got involved with me. So like you, Ken, trying to put the blame on anyone else but yourself. Little Coward.” Ken flinched at the nickname, clearly not having forgotten it in the time he’d been away.  
“Just leave Hakyeon out of this. You never showed mercy on any of them, not once. Just let him go, you have Taekwoon. I won’t take him- I won’t.”

Hongbin’s sudden laughter echoed in Hakyeon’s ears, painfully so and making him wince, wishing he had the strength in his arms to lift his hands over his ears and cover them. But nothing worked, instead he was rendered a slave to his own dysfunctional body, forced to listen to something he felt he had no part of. When Hongbin’s laughter died down and he’d stepped around the bar, gun by his side and Ken seemingly not willing to make a move just yet, he spoke again.  
“Did you think you ever truly had any chance of taking him from me? He belongs to me. You did too, once, until you proved to be worthless.” There was no laughter or kindness or any signs of remorse when Hongbin spoke to Ken, the look in those eyes as cold as everything else about the man.

It was enough for Ken to know he’d run out of time.

“Ah well. C’est la vie.”

The gunshot broke through the murky space of Hakyeon’s mind for just a moment, his ears ringing as from the corner of his eye he could see the stillness of Ken’s body before the man fell backwards. Flashes of red and grey were too much for the elder to handle, his brain shutting down and giving in to the whims of his body, his world swimming black before he was gone.

_**“My colour is only you.”** _


End file.
